Think About It

I am the first person to admit that I am totally flawed. I could tell you everything I think is wrong with me and everything that should be improved. I assume that because I know my weaknesses and admit them, I am so much better off because then they can’t sneak up on me and no one else can use them against me. This might be just me, hopefully not though because otherwise this post is rather irrelevant.

I watched this video that does a great job of demonstrating how often girls underestimate their physical attractiveness. All of the women described their faces as much less attractive than their actual appearances, but to them, what they described was what they thought. When it comes to self evaluation, your perception is often your reality. In high school I struggled a lot with self confidence and eating issues. So many people would say “you’re so pretty, why can’t you just see that.” My reality was that I thought about how I compared to Victoria’s Secret models and fitspo models. Real life wasn't important to me, because I didn't live in that reality. I didn't look at myself as who I am or appreciate the good things I had going for me.

Sometimes I think about my weaknesses, that I used to attribute as being character flaws, and I assumed that they’re just an uncontrollable part of my life and that they would always hold me down. After watching the above video, I become vividly conscious of the fact that the only person holding me back is myself, and that ends now. For someone who prides myself on being in control, I wasn't in control of my own thoughts.

For example, I always thought I was the type of girl that didn't know how to be single. I haven’t really been single since the beginning of my senior year of high school, so when I found myself single over the summer after what I would define as a “learning experience” of an almost year relationship, I started the typical “I’m going to die alone with 75 cats and a nonexistent heart” post breakup depression. No joke I cried a couple of times about the fact that I would never get married because I suck at relationships. Dramatic? Me? Never. As crazy as it sounds, in my head it was true. I really was going to die alone a crazy cat lady, and as anyone who is as much of a dog person as me knows, that is terrifying. Then, after coming back to school, I realized I was in college and I was totally and completely fine because I’m a twenty year old with blonde hair, a nice ass, and what I like to think is an above average personality with a good sense of humor. I realized that I only “didn't know how to be single” because I was telling myself that I didn't know how to be single. I stopped freaking the hell out, and now I am enjoying myself doing whatever I want to do, which often involves eating cookie dough rather than thinking about boys because the Pillsbury dough boy can be such a better lover than a drunken frat boy. The main point is, I became what I thought I was.

The power of thought is incredible. I mean, girls can freak out so much about the possibility of being pregnant that they trick their hormones into making a pregnancy test positive. Yea, that’s a thing, let that sink in. Everyone has limits and weaknesses, but think about whether you are telling yourself that they exist or if they actually do. Chances are they are a safety net to protect yourself, even if they do more harm than good. Live your life for you, because at the end of the day your happiness is really the only thing you can control. Do what you want, and accept your mistakes, but don’t accept anything less than you deserve, which is obviously the best. Keep your head, heels, and standards high and if you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.